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[quote:1ah4kb0f]how do you know its home[/quote:1ah4kb0f]

When your desire and taste for trust becomes irresistible, when you think your heart will explode with gratitude for a trust so pure and delicious that you bang the side of your head wondering why on earth you didn’t clue in sooner. And when you become simple again.

[quote:1ah4kb0f]when I say Lord I am not worthy to recieve you but only say the word and I shall be healed, each time and I mean each time I am just shaking, with such appreciation, emotion, just a feeling I can’t begin to describe[/quote:1ah4kb0f]

I love all the words. They are like food. I love saying the words. Sometimes I don’t say them; I just listen to others say them and am so happy that there are others who can say those words. Thank you Lord for the others. And thank you for the words.

My favourite words are

[quote:1ah4kb0f]Holy, holy, holy Lord, God of power and might,
Heaven and earth are full of your glory.
Hosanna in the highest.
Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord.
Hosanna in the highest.[/quote:1ah4kb0f]

If I had been saying the words up until then, then I find it very difficult to speak in the middle of the Sanctus. I feel very very heavy and very very still, peaceful, content. I do speak, but softly. Just a whisper.

I wish we had more time after Communion. I wish I could just kneel there for a half hour and not have to stand up, sit down, stand up, file out, shakes hands, and go home. Sometimes I just want to live in the Church and never go home.

When I read about Luther I find so much in common with many non-Catholics I have known. The biggest single thing is trust. Why don’t people come to the Church? Their lack of trust; their decision to transfer onto the nearest authority figure all the hurt, disappointment, and damage they have suffered in their lives by virtue of misused or abused power in the hands of those who were bigger and stronger than they were. And of course the nearest authority figure is the Church, because she [b:1ah4kb0f]is[/b:1ah4kb0f] Catholic; she [b:1ah4kb0f]is[/b:1ah4kb0f] everywhere; and she [b:1ah4kb0f]is[/b:1ah4kb0f] always near.

What was it that God said to Paul? “Saul! Saul! Why do you persecute me?” Then he struck him down from his high horse, blinded him, and sent him to the apostles. Well, here is the test of a reasonable person! Saul could have sat there in the dust til Kingdom come, clenching his fist at God and blaming Him for… well… everything. But he didn’t. He submitted himself to a learning moment. And he learned.

Poor old Luther had to do it his own way even when it became patently obvious to him that his own way was digging him deeper into the Pit. And of course he decided that the Church’s efforts to correct him and to prevent his private troubles from becoming public troubles were persecution.

The more I understand Luther, the more I understand many of the non-Catholics I know whose impaired trust and cognitive distortions about the Church keep them wandering.