silence–actually sometimes when one looks too hard for a sign or message from God, we miss it.

I am reminded of a story I heard.

There was a man who prayed night after night that he would win the lottery. But day after day he would be dissappointed after watching the drawing on TV. This went on for weeks before he asked God, “I have prayed every day to win the lottery; why haven’t you let me win?” God said, “I am trying, but first you need to buy a lottery ticket!”

It sounds like you have thought out, and even tryed to take those first steps, which is good, because taking the first small step is maybe just what God needs in order to help you by answering your prayers.