November 15, 2012 at 12:32 am #2157
I was raised as Catholic, Baptized,and received Confirmation and Holy Eucharist.
I ended up taking wrong path and ran away from home at 16 yrs old. I married outside of Church and it was a huge mistake. Physical and mental Abuse caused me to finally leave. I was actually beaten in the head with The Holy Bible that belonged to me. My husband told me it was evil and only the King James Version was the right one. Neither one of us discussed our religious beliefs before we were married. I don’t think we ever would have gotten married if we had. Like I said…a BIG mistake and I was young and naive.
Because I had run away when I was so young, I had no one to turn to. Stupidly, I once again married outside of my faith. I had been away from the church all this time. I ended up being blessed with a beautiful child, but once again had married a very controlling man and was abusive to me. I started going to church and had our child Baptized in the catholic Church. I ended up once again divorcing and have been alone for 5 years…my child is now grown and gone off to college.
Question is: Recently I have gotten in touch with my family. My mother tells me I am not allowed to ever receive communion when I go to church because I have been divorced. I feel so abandoned. I know I have made some terrible mistakes in my life and the only things that matters to me is to be able to return back to the Church and receive Holy Communion. My life has been so lonely and the only time I feel better is sitting peacefully in the church. It is there that I feel at home. I thought God was suppose to forgive me if I went to confession and repented of all I have done wrong.
Am I forever banned from the Church allowing me to receive communion. I feel just awful about this.
Can anyone tell me what I can do to receive Holy Communion? I just want to live the right way now and do what is right.
TrishTNovember 15, 2012 at 1:55 am #10555
Hi Trish. Thank you for sharing your story. It is a common misconception that one cannot receive communion after a divorce. Your situation has added complexity in that you remarried and divorced again. I believe you should meet with your local parish priest about your situation and find out what the next steps are. God bless you.November 15, 2012 at 1:56 pm #10556
Thank you for your input. I thought it was only God who forgives me if I was truly sorry and repented for all my wrong doings. I am much older now and see what all I had done was wrong. At the time I just didn’t. I had lost my way, my family and all sense of direction. Now it seems that it is man that I have to turn to get permission in order to maybe allow me to receive my Lord and Savior at Mass.
The problem is, I can’t talk about what happened to me without breaking down. The abuse was to traumatic. I can’t even remember dates and things maybe required for details on when or where it was I was married the first time from a traumatic brain injury nor do I live in the same state.
I have prayed for forgiveness and thought I was forgiven, but the church apparently is going to make it impossible to come back and be whole with the church.
I feel I can’t go back home ( our Church) without feeling so much shame for past sins that should have been wiped clean.
Funny thing is I have prayed and prayed for God to forgive. Years back I actually had a dream of Pope John Paul that was directly in front of me and he was holding the Eucharist in one hand and white light was radiating from the Host, and a beautiful golden chalice in the other hand. He told me “This is the body of Christ” and he placed it on my tongue.
You have no idea what that was like to experience even though it was a dream. It seemed so real…as I could actually feel in my dream. He had such a peaceful look and with so much love radiating from his face. I have never felt so close with our Lord through this dream. It is indescribable.
It was through this dream that made me realize how much I need to keep receiving my Lord and Savior and go back into the church and be a part of it.
I feel so lost right now. I just don’t understand why man can’t forgive me and let me come back. It’s like telling me I can come home with the family but not allowed to come to the dinner table because I am not good enough.
I wish this life was over to tell the truth. I can’t do anything right it seems. I only want to be with my heavenly Father. I know He will not turn me away.
TrishaTNovember 16, 2012 at 5:58 am #10557
Welcome, you are correct in some areas. Yes it is God who forgives our sins. Only God has that inherent authority to do so. However as we see in the Scriptures, Jesus, who is the Second person of the Trinity gave that authority to the Apostles, and they through Apostolic Succession transmitted that authority down to their successors, who are the bishops and priests who serve the Church today.
One thing that many Catholics and non-Catholics do not understand about the Sacraments, is that they are all means which Jesus uses to give us grace. While He did establish some criteria, such as water for Baptism, and Bread and Wine for the Eucharist, which we must use for the sacrament to be valid, we sometimes forget, it is not the priest’s power or holiness that makes the Sacrament work, but that they have been intrusted with Jesus’ priesthood. It is Jesus who promised that when the Apostles (and today the priests who share in Jesus’ priesthood today) forgive sins, it is Jesus who is working through the Sacrament. The priest is acting on His behalf, (in theology we call it In Persona Christi, or in the person of Christ) the same way the president of the US or the Queen of England send a delegate to another country with the authority to speak on behalf of the one who sent them.
As to your marriages, Jon is 100% correct, you need to speak to your parish priest. Now you can go to a priest at any parish, and discuss the marriages. Depending on the situation the marriages may have been perfectly legal in the State or Province you lived in, but may not have been recognized as a Sacrament. This is really not the place to discuss all the perticulars of your case. Divorce in itself would not prevent you from reception of communion, If you are not living with someone as if you were married, (shacking up) now, and your desire is to follow what Christ commanded, and the Church He founded teaches, you can go to confession and recieve the Eucharist.
I’m glad you came here to find out what the real story is, as it seems that some of the information you were given before asking here may not have been accurate.
So see a priest in a parish near you, and know that you will be added to the prayers of those who frequent this site.November 17, 2012 at 2:16 am #10558
Thank you for information and advice.
I sure wish I could go back and do things differently but we all know that can’t happen.
I only want to do whats right and devote the rest of my life to our Lord and Savior.
On my good days I try to visit at nursing homes and take treats or Holy Cards. There are so many people that feel so abandoned there by their families and some don’t have family at all. I relate a lot to feeling the way they do, because for years I in a sense did not have any family.
I wish more Christian people knew what nursing homes are like. I am talking about the worst of the worst homes in whatever town they live in. It is like living hell to tell the truth. To see someones face light up when I visit and say a prayer for them is such a blessing. I like to stop along the way walking down the halls and speak a few words to no matter who it is. It’s such a sad place, but I can’t help but see Jesus in each and everyone there.
Guess I have said enough.
I see I have a lot of things to read that can maybe help me understand things better that maybe I was misinformed about.
Thank you for your insight and God bless you for all that you do in God’s name.
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